The World Is A Stage

It's been a very heavy week. Pugels was driving me mad! I was rushing down the elevator 15 floors five times a day for the past 5 or 6 days and it was making me a nervous wreck. I could hardly sleep because when she woke up and jumped off the bed...at 2 in the morning...I was afraid she was going to pee. And as hard as I tried she was still peeing on the carpet. She seemed to avoid the paper I put down. All day she was scratching at my legs and racing for the door. I realized something was wrong, clever me, but had no car to get her to the vet. And this was making her agitated too so she wanted to play all the time, scratching my arms with her nails. The nurse here wrapped up one arm.

The administrator of the building told me at the beginning that a neighbor of hers had a Pug dog and maybe he would like another one. I always thought it was sad to raise a dog in one of these apartments because the rooms are small. Finally last Saturday I asked the Adminstrator if she would talk to her neighbor. And I finally told my sister. All the rushing up and down seemed to be making me short of breath. On Sunday Betty called and said that she would take Pugles for a week so the family vet could take a look at her. He is a good friend and stops by often with his wife and new baby.

So on Sunday I sat down stairs with my little dog and waited for my sister to come from church. At the same time she was bringing me a computer chair from 1019 because I get such backaches from the straight chair I had been using. The car came and I managed to get the chair out of the car and put Pugles in the back seat. I wondered if I would ever see again as I went up in the elevator with the puppy buggy for the last time.

It has been very peaceful and I slept eight hours instead of the three or four I'd been getting. Called my sister this morning and they were just fine. Pugles is still looking around for me but my sister keeps scratching her on her head and talking to her. There is a large patio at 1019 and Pugles is happily racing around playing in the bushes and trotting here and there. She is in a perfect place and my sister is fond of her already. The vet was by the very next day, on Sunday with medicine for her severe bladder infection. Don't ever let me try to tell you I'm a big baby or anything like that because anyone who could have lived my life during the past year and a half...is tough!

My sister has been great during this year in my small apartment. Since I have no car and can't seem to force myself to take the city buses she has brought me lots of thrift shop clothes and taken me to buy food. I also have my helper, Cristine who brings me food and money from the bank. No matter what I just said, I am a big baby, afraid of people, new adventures and just about everything. I almost never go out but managed to walk Pugles many times a day which was good for me. Today I haven't been out but tomorrow is another day.

The first thing I was considering after Pugles left, was a trip to India. Even called to find out about tickets and things but you know what finally brought me out of my deep depression today. I realized that it is all just part of His drama. His drama has one plot, and that is to make me realize that none of this is real at all. This small apartment is a stage and I am the only actor here now. Everyone else has left. Pugles was only a prop and her purpose was to give me love and to take my love. That's all. If I went to India it would only be another big stage and I would be playing another character...and that would make it even more difficult for me to see behind my masque, to find out who I really am. Now I'm alone again. Getting the dog was a mistake...not because she wasn't sweet and good. I LOVED HER MORE THAN ANYONE WILL EVER UNDERSTAND. I WAS SICK AND ALONE AND DESPARATE WHEN SHE CAME AND SHE FILLED EVERY NEED FOR COMPANIONSHIP. But hopefully I don't need a prop anymore. Hopefully I need only HIM. My meditation was growing weaker and I was saying my prayers faster and faster because I had less time to spend. Swami gave me Pugles to sooth my lonely soul and then took her away so that I can get back to my prayers where I should be. I SHOULD NEVER ALLOW MYSELF TO FEEL LONELY WHEN HE IS WITH ME EVERY SECOND. I could bring her back when the infection is gone but how can I? Now I know how a single mom feels when she relinquishes her baby for adoption for a better life for her. I've been singing love songs to Swami today and writing more and so the first day has passed. Pugles will stop trying to find me soon. The only way I can ever stop this terrible pain in my heart is to realize for certain that, like everything else, its a perfect lesson from Swami and that my real self doesn't miss her at all. Hopefully I will be able to miss my real self that much and find it behind the masque!

God is nigh

Something very cool happened yesterday evening. My husband, David and I went to a Senior Citizen Center for David to take a Viennese waltz lesson. While he was taking the lesson I strolled through Wickham park in Melbourne, Florida.



During my walk I noticed two red sandhill cranes near a lakelet digging diligently for their supper with their long, dark ditch-digging beaks. They seemed oblivious to me as I stood looking down from a small hill.



I started intoning the Om. The Cosmic sound of Om rippled across the elfin pond disappearing into

the green sanctuary of Florida sand pines, diamond oak and tall wispy grasslands. I could feel the atmosphere becoming saturated with the Holy music of The Om.



Apparently the Red Sandhill cranes were also in tune with this mystic syllable. Much to my surprise and delight the pair stopped foraging and turned towards me with an alert look. Entranced by the sound of the Om they climbed the embankment then ambled curiously towards me. The cranes paused about 6 feet from where I stood like the pied piper crooning the Om.



After awhile the dominant crane opened his beak and started to chant along with me. It was a strange duet to say the least. The crane attempting to intone The Om produced a saw-like trumpeting sound that reverberated through the park boomeranging back.



This went on for about 10 minutes a sweet communion with nature that demonstrated how connected we all are. Suddenly the two cranes lowered their red foreheads, long necks pointing straight ahead, they opened their wings and flapped upward with stringy black legs trailing behind in flight. I watched as they vanished in the dense forest preserve.



Purple and blue shades of twilight blanketed the sleepy forestland. Softly singing a song I had learned in camp I bid the beautiful park adieu:



"Day is done, gone the sun,

From the lake, from the hills, from the sky;

All is well, safely rest, God is nigh."

Krishna Birthday Celebration

Sai Ram,

It’s the start of Krishna birthday celebration. People are coming into the ashram for Krishna or weekend. There were more people here,

The weather has been strange with rain at night, maybe some sunshine in the morning or early afternoon leading to cloudiness and more rain.

Saturday – August 20. A brilliant performance by 126 Sai Baba devotees from Poland. This was the Sai Pilgrimage From Poland “with love to the lotus feet of Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba”. The choir sang 17 songs in Polish, Sanskrit and English. The songs were devoted to Baba. They were pure devotional. This energy captured the audience who cheered each song.

About 2 weeks of rehearsals here resulted in a near perfect performance that was appreciated by all. No language barrier when music travels soul to soul.

Attached is a photo of the women with their special headbands and shawls.

Sunday – August 21. We had some heavy rain at night followed by light rain. The day was cloudy. As we entered Kulwant Hall, we saw that it had been sparsely decorated in preparation for Krishna’s birthday. The columns were covered with a sky blue cloth with gold strips. There were also blue bunting hanging from the 1st floor of the mandir and sparkling blue streamers over the center driveway. There were a few other colored streamers hanging in different places.

The real treat of the day was a musical performance by devotees from Srikakulam District in northeast Andhra Pradesh. The music and the singing were incredible. They carried us to another place of peace and joy.

The 3500 devotees of Srikakulam made their annual Parthi Yatra. It is said that they started the concept of Pathi Yatras 10 years ago.

Monday – August 22. Krishna Day. The hall had been decorated further with gold streamers along the edge of the blue ones over the center driveway. In addition, mixed in were red lanterns. They were also located in other places in front of the mandir. Along the side of the streamers over the center driveway were blue buntings. The rail perimeter of the hall had decorations.

Everything looked beautiful.

The crowd in the morning was larger than usual. It was nice seeing the hall more than half full.

The students started their one hour program at 8:30 with beautiful music and singing that put us at another level. After about 20 minutes there was commotion in the center driveway as Gopi’s led animals ranging from cows to pigeons to peacocks and deer lined up in the driveway. Krishna and others came out of the mandir stop in front of the Samadhi before going to bless and feed the animals. (Photos)

Meanwhile, 6 dancers in identical costumes danced in front of the Samadhi. After 5 to 10 minutes the chief priest wearing maroon cloth blessed the animals with prayers. The animals left soon afterwards.

The music continued to put us in heavenly bliss while the prasadam brought us back to Earth.

It was a great morning with Sai’s Love being felt the whole time. It was more like the before days. It was wonderful having so many people.

Once again, we were shown that ashram activities would continue as usual. Sai was present but visible to only a few.

In the evening, devotees from Srikakulam presented a dance drama “Siva Leelalu”.
There were many different stories. All of them well danced with incredible singing.
Dances to Ganesha, Sai Baba, Shiva & Parvathi, Kannappan and Kali victory over Mahishasura. (Photos)

These bal vika children have performed for Baba for the last 5 years.

Tuesday – August 23. Everything has returned to normal. The crowds in the hall, canteens and in the village are smaller. Rudram and bhajans were especially heavenly tonight.

Warning: A new version of an old scam has been making its way over the
internet using Sai Baba name. Many of you would realize immediately that it is a phony. But be on the alert as I am sure this is just the beginning. This one claims you have been select to get a share of the fortune discovered at the ashram but you need to register and send money.

Reminder: that no soliciting of money is allowed or done by any official Baba organization. (Attached)

Liberated – Peter Keyer died August 7, 2011. Some of you knew him.
Attached is a tribute .

Seema Messages are once again being attached to these reports. With this report there are “The Inner Eye”, “The Right to Be in the Right” and In the Company of God.

A separate list will still be maintained for those who want to receive the messages as soon as it is released. Waiting for them to come with the Baba Report could be as long as a week later.

To receive Seema Messages go to after the Thoughts:

Thought for the Day
22 August 2011

Krishna thus means the one who cultivates our hearts and raises in them the crop of bliss. The supreme message of the life of Krishna is the Divine Love Principle. Divine Love is strong, brilliant and unbreakable like diamond, and is also extremely precious. If you want to secure such Divine love, your love for God must be equally strong. You can cut diamond only with another diamond.

Baba

Thought for the Day
23 August 2011

Only when you put into practice the love in which you have faith, love will grow. Since you do not practice what you profess, your faith gets weakened. A plant will grow only when it is watered regularly. When you have planted the seed of love, you can make it grow only by watering it with love every day. The tree of love will grow and yield the fruits of love. Many today do not perform those noble deeds that will promote love. When you wish to develop love for the Lord, you must continuously practice loving devotion to the Lord.

Baba

What is Service?

The Tampa Bay Sai Center is very service oriented. They like to do large service projects such as medical camps and Dental Clinics and this is to be expected as some of the members are doctors. When they start a new project they send emails to all their members suggesting they get on board. You can see their point in doing that. Many hands make work easier or something. My health isn't good and I have no transportation so I never have joined in. But this morning I was asked to contribute money to the service project. Now I am sure that they are sincere and the money would be used correctly but I've never been asked for money before and it was a bit of a shock.

Isn't there a hard and fast rule in the organization that no one should ask for money? I've heard people say that the thing they liked most about Baba people is that they have never asked for money. Swami has always been so strict about that. 30 years at Prasanthi and no one ever asked me for money for the ashram. Maintenance charges were always minimal and dear Mr. Unni was always so careful. I could be cynical and say...hump, He hasn't been gone even a year and already they're asking for money but I know it isn't like that. The project is a good one, school supplies for troubled youth but asking money is never a good idea. In fact I've been involved in so many projects over the years and the rule of thumb was, you pay the bills yourself. In fact you consider it an opportunity to do that. 15 books I wrote and printed....15,000 books for children donated to Swami's Trust was my contribution to His Mission....15,000 dollars and on a pension too. I'm not bragging. I am so grateful that Swami allowed me to do that over the years. Being a foreigner and a woman it was the only way I could do service in India. But my point is that it was my project (Swami's really) and I footed the bill happily.

So are things going to change now with Swami gone? (Swami is not gone) Will money rear its ugly head? Got an email saying some Sai Org. in Europe was asking for $10,000 from people for service projects. God help us! Perhaps we need a stronger hand now for guidance since it may be difficult for some to obey Swami's principals. They are so high and pristine pure that it is difficult to live by them but I think we must do that.

What is service anyway? I could carry around peanut butter sandwiches for the homeless around here. Actually chocolate chip cookies are easier to handle and bring more smiles than a soggy sandwich. But why isn't that as good a service project as a Dental camp. You know what? I need bottom dentures myself and can't afford it. So maybe that's one reason why I don't rush out to the Dental Camp.

Maybe my service days are over and I can rest on my laurels. Maybe I've done enough now. Service should be an attitude anyway shouldn't it? Shouldn't we always be ready to serve our fellow man in any way possible like a kindness or a cookie or...an offer of transportation to the Center to worship the Lord? I think I should simply ask the Center to remove my name from their list. I hate to, they're such nice people.

My Little Dog

My Programmer read my blog yesterday before posting it and said that I should get rid of the dog. He said that attachments were a very bad thing at this stage of the game and that I should simply eliminate this attachment to Puggle. There should be no obstacle between my Self and the final goal post at this point, not after all I've been through to get here. Swami took away everything on this last journey to St. Petersburg and having a dog, an attachment, could destroy all gains. I agreed with him but said....Swami made me do it....the usual lame excuse. My Programmer said this would be a good blog.

But to tell you the truth, I couldn't 'get rid of my precious Puggle' if my life depended on it. I really didn't have a reason to live when He brought Puggle in except to think I might find out who I really am. Fat chance. I have drifted from 'absolute despair' to being just 'a bit sad' during the last year after leaving 'the promised land' and then Swami's passing away, two major traumas. I don't think that it is possible to find your Real Self in the aftermath of total destruction. I was trying to find a descriptive word for this last thought and all I kept seeing was the aftermath of those demon cyclones that leveled Joplin Missouri and that place in Alabama.

The real Self is joy and bliss and beauty and love, right? Our inner core is simply Swami who is all that. So when you're surrounded by loneliness and sorrow it's hard to pick up the pieces and 'carry on'. It wasn't possible and so..right...Swami sent in Puggle. You've heard the song, 'send in the clowns' well Puggle is my clown. She follows me around this tiny apartment moving from a position at my feet when I'm at the computer to when I'm watching TV. And her favorite position is my lap or next to me in the chair. She must have been a very lonely little dog before she came here because she watches me all the time with her huge bug eyes. And she really wants to touch me with her paw or with her little curly tail or some part of her, all the time. She lays down next to me when I'm praying or even sleeping. You might think this would be annoying but...it's love and it's Swami. She's also funny. I call her my circus dog because she leaps from chair to chair and jumps on to tables. I guess she must have had a very deprived life before she came because the man who brought her said she was only three and had had seven litters of pups, baby Pugs. I guess she was pretty much caged all the time.

Anyway, Swami gave me someone to love. Someone to ...(my vocabulary is zilch this morning). What I mean is, I can do for her a lot more than I would do for myself. SHE HAS GIVEN ME MY HEALTH BACK TOO. I RACE TO AND FROM THE ELEVATOR AND PUSH HER STROLLER OUT FOR HER WALKS ANDTO PEE, THREE OR FOUR TIMES A DAY. I inadvertently (thank god for spell check) leave the apt' and walk when I would just hibernate usually. But do I need her? Well He took away almost my very life when He took me away from my India so I have really no expectations anymore. I can go back to subsistence living, Swami, no problem but the spark of fun and joy Puggle gives me lights up my life. I'm attached but ...I want her to be in my life but I don't need her. I need Myself. I am still looking deep inside for my Glorious Self, my God Self, my Swami. Maybe Puggle senses it.

I Never Promised You a Rose Garden

I spend my life these days trying to walk Puggles so she won't pee or poop in this room. Well sometimes it's OK but then it's really never easy.

I woke up this morning with my sinus thing plus the lower back pain. The first trip is 4:30 this morning was hard. By noon I had rushed her down the 15 floors in her buggy three times and I was running out of breath. At about one o'clock I smelled pee and found that she had gone in the bedroom and not on the paper either. I have a place set up with plastic bags and newspapers but this time she didn't use it. I was furious and haven't glanced in her direction for the past four hours.

I had been in pain, took Aleve and I guess I expected things to lighten up because I am not well. This made me think about how tough life really is. Who cares if you're not well. My sister is always saying that Daddy spoiled me. Mama tried to compensate by usually being tough. I could not see that he spoiled me. I mean he was always a sweet good person compassionate to one and all not just me.

But maybe she has a point. Daddy always made things better. I think as a result I believed that you could get an even break. That maybe there's a rose garden somewhere. So as a result I can see that I'm soft. I don't do well on the long haul. I always think that things are OK except sometimes when things are tough. Now I see that things are usually tough but sometimes they're OK. So you stay strong and prepared for the tough times just being glad when it's not so bad. That's why people are cautious and selfish and not so giving all the time. I on the other hand am almost always giving and open and trusting to a fault. And when on top of everything else you don't have a family, a husband or kids and you're on your own, things are really tough and you'd better be cautious. Then your precious Beloved leaves His body early after you have had to leave your homeland so it's more then sinus and lower back pain. Your heart hurts too. Maybe Daddy promised me a rose garden that never grew....accept for 30 years in India. . So every single day I'm rushing down the 15 floors on the elevator at least 3 or 4 times a day and that will never end. You still step in puddles of pee and sleep in a room with a urine smell. Forever and ever hallelujah hallelujah.

You know I've been writing these 50's pop love songs to Swami lately. One of them goes something like...'You're nobody til somebody loves you' With this kind of tough hard life I can see how having a significant other might be a wonderful thing, I mean if there were one other person in the world who was on your side, things would improve somewhat. At the age of 77 I know that's not an option any more. Even with the puddles I'm glad I have Puggles.. But the last line of that song had a twist, an 'inner' twist on it. The song goes, 'You're nobody til somebody loves you, so find yourself somebody to love.' I changed it to reflect the truth, 'You're nobody til somebody loves you, so search and find YOURSELF to love', Now that I'm having a tough day...as usual...and know that life itself is tough except once in a while, why the hell go on with it...why? Because I have found MYSELF to love and no one can take that away. My Daddy thought I was worth it and I am.

Independence Day Report

Sai Ram,

The week started off interesting enough with many vip’s at darshan with their security people. The crowd was a little larger. I wondered if Monday being India Independence Day had anything to do with it.

Sunday – August 14. Former chief minister of Andhra Pradesh, K. Rosaiah, and his entourage came to darshan this morning.

As we went outside the Ganesh Gate, there was a line of cars parked on Main Street more than half way toward the Main Gate - about 20 cars. Main Street became one lane traffic just as people were coming out from darshan.

It seems that K. Rosaiah, with his entourage went inside a hotel across from the Ganesh Gate for a meeting with local farmers. Meanwhile congestion on Main Street.

He returned for evening darshan.

Monday – August 15. Today was 65th Independence Day for India. There was nothing special in the morning. However, in the evening there was a 65 minute drama entitled “Aazaadi – Inner Dependence” centered around India’s independence while highlighting Truth and Righteousness.

Several scenes from the past were used to convey the importance of these two values. The post graduate students from the Prasanthi Nilayam campus did an excellent job.

Arathi was just before 7:00 which was unusual. Since the dedication of the MahaSamadhi, evening arathi has been at 6:00. The later hour reminded me of the physical Baba days when we never knew when Baba would give darshan or when arati would be.

Tuesday – August 16. Rain last night but a sunny day until the afternoon when it became cloudy. With no formal program, Rudram, bhajans, arati and darshan.

Wednesday – August 17. Some rain during the evening and a brief shower just before noon and before arati. With no formal program, there was Rudram, bhajans, arati and darshan.

Thursday – August 18. There was no formal program but there was Rudram, bhajans, arati, and darshan.

Friday – August 19. With a rainy evening and a cloudy day, there was Rudram, bhajans, arati and darshan.

Saturday night a group from Poland is to perform. Sunday and Monday will be Krishna birthday celebration.

It seems to me that more people are bringing flowers to leave at the Samadhi. See attached notice about Invitations. There will be a Christmas program. Anyone planning to come, continue with those plans. Baba will be expecting you. The schedule that was set out is subject to changes. It was a guide.

Bharath

Bhagawan referred to Indian Culture as Bharathiya Samskruti, because as He explains, Bharath is not just the country defined by some man-made geographical boundaries. Bharath stands for Bha (God) and Rathi (Love). It is a land that promotes and nurtures love for God. The Bharatiya culture stood for Sanatana Dharma that prescribed the eternal blueprint for creation. It stood for unity of all mankind as one family (Vasudaiva Kutumbakam) and always prayed for universal welfare (||Samasta Lokaa Sukhino Bhavantu||). It recognized the Divine principle immanent in all creation and therefore stressed on the principle of Unity in Diversity.

Attached is an interesting fact sheet about India that came out on Independence Day. Also, an interesting article on yoga and the speed of light.

In addition, there is a PowerPoint presentation called “Sai Darshan” in English and Spanish.

Some of you might be interested in a web site: http://www.values.com

Seema Messages are once again being attached to this report. Seema Dewan has received permission for the open distribution of the messages.

With this report there is one message: “The Universal body”.

A separate list will still be maintained for those who want to receive the messages as soon as it is released. Waiting for them to come with the Baba Report could be as long as a week later.

To receive Seema Messages go to after the Thoughts:

Thought for the Day
22 July 2011

The lives of individuals are determined by the activities that the individual adopted either in previous lives or in this. The consequences of acts done in the past lives that affect this life are called Praarabdha. The Karma that one is engaged in now which is bound to affect the future is called Aagaami. The aggregate Karma of the past that is slowly being worked out by the individual life after life is called Sanchitha. Just as an activity that one is engaged in can be referred to as Karma, being silent and quiescent is called Akarma! If you are not attached to the fruits of the action you perform, but are engaged in it as your duty, as your way of worship; then you can practice Akarma even when engaged in Karma. This is the highest Sadhana.

Baba


Thought for the Day
31 July 2011

Just as many varieties of fish and other aquatic creatures move about inside an aquarium, multitudes of human beings move about in the sea called the Lord. Some are undeveloped, some underdeveloped; they swim around, greedy and selfish. In the midst of this crowd of ignorant beings are a few Jnanis (wise ones) and Yogis (highly developed souls). Since they are mixed up with the ignorant crowd, it becomes difficult to distinguish the wise from the others. A microscope is necessary to identify the red corpuscles in the blood; similarly, a special microscope is needed to find the wise. That microscope is constant Dhyana (contemplation of the Lord).

Baba

Program Schedule !

Om Sai Ram!

The tentative program schedule until the end of January has been released Program changes at any time. Note that Christmas and New Years Alumni programs have not been

included. Can be added later.

Programme Calendar
Unless stated otherwise
Location Kulwant Hall

Mon Aug 15, 2011
5pm - 6pm Students Programme: Independence Day Drama

Sat Aug 20, 2011
5pm - 6pm Polish Choir Group

Sun Aug 21, 2011
5pm - 6pm Srikakulam Music Programme: Sri Ramesh

Mon Aug 22, 2011
8:30am -9:30am Students Programme: Sri Krishna Janmashtami

5pm - 6pm Srikakulam Cultural Programme: Sivaleelalu

Wed Aug 31, 2011
5pm - 6pm Student's Programme: Ramadan

Thu Sep 1, 2011
8:30am -9:30am Student's Programme: Ganesh Chaturthi

Sat Sep 3, 2011
5pm - 6pm Student's Programme: Ganesha Immersion

Mon Sep 5, 2011
Kerala Sai Med visit of 400 operated patients and families

Mon Sep 5, 2011 - Thu Sep 8, 2011
5pm - 5:30pm Kerala Speeches

Tue Sep 6, 2011
5pm - 5:30pm Kerala Speeches

Wed Sep 7, 2011
5pm - 6pm Kerala Music programme –
Sampradaya Bhajans by Sri. Vinayachandran

Thu Sep 8, 2011
9am- 9:30am Bhajans By Kerala State Bhajan Group

5pm - 6pm
Kerala Carnatic (Vocal)- Master.Mahadevan and
Devotional songs by Sri. TS Radhakrishnan

Fri Sep 9, 2011
9am- 9:30am Bhajans By Kerala State Bhajan Group

5pm - 6pm Kerala Meeting and Drama
Description: Veda by 500 Bal Vikas children for 15 minutes,
Drama­ Krishnakripa sagaram- 55 minutes- 22 students of Sri Sai Vidya
Vihar,Aiwaye and 18 Bal Vikas children.
For the meeting Sri Jayakumar I AS, Addl.chief secretary, has already
consented. Confirmation from Sri.Sankaranarayanan, Hon.Governor is
awaited.

Mon Sep 12, 2011
Kerala Sai Nidhi visit of 200 advocates and families
Mon Sep 12, 2011 - Tue Sep 13, 2011

Sat Sep 24, 2011
5pm - 6pm Prakasam Dst Music Programme –
Devotional songs by Youth

Sun Sep 25, 2011
5pm - 6pm Prakasam District Drama - Seva Aradhana

Mon Sep 26, 2011
Kerala Hospital operated patients and families visit-Sai Med
Man Sep 26, 2011 - Tue Sep 27, 2011

Fri Sep 30, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra
5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Sat Oct 1, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra
5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Sun Oct 2, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra

5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Mon Oct 3, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra

5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Tue Oct 4, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra

5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme


Wed Oct 5, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra

5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Thu Oct 6, 2011
7am- 11am Dasara Sapthaham
Poorna Chandra

5pm - 6pm Cultural Programme

Fri Oct 7, 2011
10am - 11am Orissa Parthi Yatra ashram cleaning
5pm - 6pm Tamil Nadu Youth Drama
8pm - 9pm Orissa speeches in double decker shed

Sat Oct 8, 2011
10am - 11am Orissa Parthi Yatra Ashram cleaning
2pm - 3pm Speeches Double Decker shed
5pm - 6pm Orissa cultural programme

Sun Oct 9, 2011
10am- 11am Orissa ashram cleaning
2pm - 3pm Orissa speeches double decker shed

Fri Oct 14, 2011
Kerala Parthi Youth Yatra 2000 members
Fri Oct 14, 2011 - Sat Oct 15, 2011


Tue Oct 18, 2011
Guntur Parthi Yatra
Tue Oct 18, 2011 - Sun Oct 23, 2011

Sat Nov 12, 2011
AP Youth Parthi Yatra
Sat Nov 12, 2011 - Man Nov 14, 2011

Mon Dec 19, 2011
Hyderabad Parthi Yatra
Man Dec 19, 2011 -Sun Dec 25, 2011

Wed Dec 21, 2011
Sikkim Youth Parthi Yatra
Wed Dec 21, 2011 - Sun Dec 25, 2011

Sun Dec 25, 2011
8:30am- 9:30am Student's Programme: Christmas


Mon Dec 26, 2011
7am - 8am Orissa Palanquin Procession
10am - 11am Orissa ashram cleaning

5pm - 6pm Orissa cultural programme

8pm - 9pm Orissa speeches double decker shed

Tue Dec 27, 2011
10am - 11am Orissa ashram cleaning
2pm - 3pm Orissa speeches double decker shed
5pm - 6pm Orissa cultural programme

Wed Dec 28, 2011
10am - 11am Orissa Ashram cleaning
2pm - 3pm Orissa speeches double decker

Wed Jan 11,2012
Student Programmes: Sports Meet, Dramas and Felicitation
Wed Jan 11,2012- Thu Jan 12, 2012

Thu Jan 26, 2012
Delhi Parthi Yatra
Thu Jan 26, 2012 - Sat Jan 28, 2012

5pm - 6pm Delhi Youth Cultural Programme

Fri Jan 27, 2012
5pm - 6pm Delhi Mahila Youth Cultural Programme

Sat Jan 28, 2012
5pm - 6pm Delhi Gents cultural Programme

Jai Sai Ram!

The Way We Were

Memories light the corners of my mind

Misty color watered memories

Of the way we were


Pictures of the smiles we left behind

Smiles we had with our sweet Swami

Of the Way we were


Can it be that it was all so simple then

Or has time rewritten every line

And if we had a chance to do it all again

Tell me could we, would we?


Memories may be beautiful and yet

What is painful to remember

tears cause us to forget

His face appears now

And we remember, whatever we remember

Of the way we were



2 Born Free


Born free as free as the wind blows

As free as the grass grows

Born free to follow your heart


Live free as Atma surrounds you

The world will astound you

And you will know who you are


Stay free with no walls around you

You're one with the roaring tide

So there's no need to hide


Be free and life is worth living

It's always worth living

Cause you are free free



3 To Dream the Impossible dream


To dream the impossible dream

To fight the unbeatable foe

To have full faith and not sorrow

To run where the brave dare not go

To right the unrighteous wrong

To love pure and chaste from afar

To try though your arms are so weary

To reach Sri Sathya Sai stars

This is my quest

To follow Sai's stars

No matter how hopeless

No matter how far

To fight for the Truth

Without question or pause

To be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause

And I know if I'll only have faith

In His glorious quest

That my heart will be peaceful and calm

And my soul takes rest

And the world will be better for this

A devotee though still covered with scars

Will strive with full faith in Sai Baba

To reach the eternal Sai Stars


4 Speak Softly (The Godfather)

Speak softly Sai and hold me warm against your heart

I hear you speak and tender trembling moments start

I'm in a world, my very own

Sharing a love that only few have ever known

Wine colored days warmed by the sun, Deep velvet nights when we are one

Speak softly Sai so no one hears us but the sky

The vows of love I make

will live on until I die

My life is yours and all because

You came into my world

So softly Sai.





5 Where do I Begin


Where do I begin to tell the story

Of how great a love can be

The sweet love story that is older than the sea

The simple truth about the love you gave to me

Where do I start

With your first Sai Ram

You gave a meaning to the empty world of mine

There'll never be another love, another time

You came into my life and made it so divine

You fill my heart

You fill my heart with very special things

With angel songs, and sweet imaginings

You fill my soul with so much love

That anywhere I go I'm never lonely

With you around, who could be lonely

I reach for your hand, it's always there

How long does it last. Can time be measured like the hours in a day

I have no answer but this much I can say

I know I'll need you til the stars all burn away

And you'll be there


6 I Remember You


I remember you

You''re the one who made my dreams come true

A few Darsans ago


I remember you' I said that I loved you, yes I do,

I do, and you seemed to know

I remember to a distant bell

and stars that fell like rain out of the blue


When my life is through

And the angels ask me to recall the bliss of it all

Then I shall tell them,I remember you






7 There's a Place for Us


There's a place for us, somewhere a place for us

Peace and quiet, another plane

Wait for me again


There's a time for us

Another time for us

Time together at your Dear Feet

Time to learn. Lessons repeat


Someday, somewhere

I'll find a new way of seeing

Darsan and a new way of being

Somewhere


There's a place for us

A time and place for us

Hold my hand as I leave the world

Hold my hand, as a new life unfurls

Somehow, Swami, with you


8 I Only have Eyes for You


Are the stars out tonight

I don't know if it's cloudy or bright

Cause I only have eyes for you, Sai


The moon may be high

but I can't see a thing in the sky

Cause I only have eyes for you


I don't know if I'm in a garden

Or in a long and crowded Que


I am here, so is Sai

Maybe millions of people go by

But they all disappear from view

Cause I only have eyes for you

With a Song

I am doing a new project. Well actually it pertains to the same old project, loving Swami more and more. A phrase from a standard tune comes to mind, 'I love you more today than yesterday dum dum dum, but not as much as,,,,to-mor-ro' That about sums it up actually. It's all about love.

Oh, about the project. I can't remember how it started exactly. I think maybe it was my idea to worship Swami in English, with English translations of the chants we do and love songs to Swami in English. Now, I love the bhajans, of course though it took me a while to do that because all my life I've been into western music based on the western scales, so-re-me-fa-so. I think Indian music is based on, sa-re-ma-pa something, anyway it wasn't so easy. In Whitefield I was a member of the Bhajan singing group for westerners and we got to sing under the tree on Sundays along with everyone else. So long ago, makes me feel weepy to think about it. Swami loved bhajan and so music filled our lives there at the ashram. Anyway so when I came back I decided to worship Him in my own way. On TV they have these programs of songs from the 60's, 'Moments to Remember' and I ordered the CD's more in order to support our Public Broadcasting than anything else. Well naturally we aren't interested in anything that doesn't pertain to Swami so I've been rewriting the lyrics making them Swami love songs.

I thought maybe I'd put these songs on U Stream in case any Sai Graduates would also like to sing love songs to Swami but somehow I can't get into their program. It might be because Swami doesn't want me to do it. Well of course that's why, who am I kidding...but the point is before I started doing this my devotion was a bit dry. We could go into that and it seems that most of my blogs so far have touched on that very subject, loving the Lord. So here I am in my little room in the state of Florida, doggie in my lap. Singing to Swami most of the day in sugary words and feeling the love growing in my heart. It actually works.

Believe it or not, it's only 5in the morning and already two titles have come to mind, 'You keep coming back like a song' and 'With a song in my heart' You know. 'With a song in my heart, I behold Your Adorable face' ? I've done about 25 songs so far but they keep coming. And my heart keeps growing sweeter. Maybe I could start writing love songs from scratch but I am very limited. I'm a singer and singers sing. I took music in college but not enough to write music. Anyway I'm not going to turn this project into any kind of a 'mind game' I deliberately veered off the Vedic tract towards a more worshipful approach to loving our Lord, heart felt.

So I may not even pass these love songs on to others which will be a first for me. I ALWAYS pass everything on to others. It's like impossible for me NOT to think of others. But maybe now, I'll just sit with my little doggie and my Swami and love him more and more because that is the whole point. I'll love Him more and more and more and then I'll love myself more and know that we are one. What else is there to do, what else is there to know, what else is there?

Depression

I have found that staying in the moment is the best thing for depression. I have found this because HE has shone it to me and it works, as HE always said it would.

If you can really stay in the here and now, there's no depression because at this very moment, everything is OK. It's only when we compare our position with that of others, that WE GET DEPRESSED. Editorial we, of course. I suppose this attitude doesn't help much when things are really rotten. But things aren't rotten at this exact moment. Puggles pooped at two am this morning but I managed to clean it up muttering, 'bad girl' The lady who helps me clean is angry but she wouldn't be here at 4;30 am anyway. So, as of this moment in time, everything is OK. In this very moment there are no comparisons and no assumptions.

I think that's why I can write better in the middle of the night. It's easier to stay in the moment. Now if I can stay in the moment today when the sun comes up and not worry that I have no future and the past isn't worth thinking about, if I can do that I won't be depressed today. But that is worrying about the future and isn't in the now.

I have been depressed all my life even in the best of times. When I was doing social work in California, loving Swami., living in a beautiful house with a very significant other, two precious doggies and driving a cute little Honda Civic, I was also seeing a shrink because I was depressed. My father's father was depressed even though he was a US senator. He wrote letters back home from Washington about his 'melancholia'. My other sister had terrible depressions as did my Daddy when a heart attack made him retire at an early age. So it runs in the family.

Once in India I went to a shrink who gave me pills. People use to talk about their problems but now they just take pills. I took them for a week but then noticed that I couldn't control my own thoughts so I stopped. Again when I was in the hospital here in the US and so alone in this apartment, the doctor gave me prosaic or something. It made me sluggish which was worse than the depressions. So I wouldn't take those pills either.

The lady who use to clean for me is angry and there's dog poop in my bedroom...no, I cleaned it up didn't I ? But somehow, now at 4:30 am, I'm not depressed. Maybe I'm still asleep but actually I'm, at my best in the early morning. It might be because at this moment in 'the promised land' people are lining up full of devotion, to be with Swami's Samadhi. Or I guess they are. I've never done that. But I've always been more aware of the 'truth' at this time....Brahmamurthi, God's hour. Can I face another day all alone here? But there I go losing the moment. I'll just have to pray to Swami to help me stay in the now. He always helps me. He helped by destroying my job, my car, my doggies and my home in Californis too. Oh and my significant other died of cancer. He did that to get me to go to India for 30 years. Then He destroyed My India to bring me back, We don't know why but we know for sure that it is always for the best....because we know He loves us and will pull us through the knot hole to merge with Him come what may.!!! I AM READY, LORD.