Atma's Last Laugh

I've always heard that when the body is miserable the Atma is happy but I didn't buy it. Now I do because finally my body is loosing ground and my atma knows that it'S HAPPY. (He or She or whatever) my atma is in pretty much in bliss. I asked Swami to write this one for me because no body is going to understand.

I have Bronchitis as most of you know. Most of you. meaning the friend in California and the friend in Nova Scotia! Chicago, you don't count!! Where have been anyway during this last dance? I'm sorry, I'll always remember you as my attendant at the hospital.

So now I know why my Swami went to so much trouble to get me here in this well appointed flat in St. Pete.. I'm here to leave this retched body once and for all. I didn't put that very well, did I? See I have all these planets in the 8th house, the house of death and have been looking forward to 'the last great adventure' almost sense I was born. It was a rotten birth and down hill ever since. Yea well, I won't horrify you with my bio data!! I hope my precious programmer will post this. He may not. Anyway this bronchitis is really bad and it's getting harder to breath. I am thinking about oxygen tanks attached to scooters and tents and things. Now listen, don't worry because its how I want it and this body still belongs to me. I only want palliative care though it may be cancer. The x-rays and the cat scan shows just a lot of trash in there. I never smoked so they don't know why it looks like that. Until this week I haven't had any trouble breathing but suddenly I do. Washed two loads the other day and collapsed, sleeping the rest of the day.

But what I'm trying to tell you is....yeah! Yeah! I'm going to be with Swami. This is one way to get back to India or if I'm lucky to 'become Swami' I figure this Susan Caffery trash can just be emptied with the garbage and the only thing worth saving, my Atma, will go on and on. This is the whole point of everything, isn't it?

I am 75, no husband and no children, no home, no clothes except this thrift store crap and no one to even say, gee, I'm gonna miss her because you know what, I already pulled up the roots. I'm really sorry this sounds like such a negative blog. Programmer may refuse to post this one. It is NOT negative. I'm very happy about it.

Ok so you want to know about Doctors and things. Well I have all this crap in my lungs and one is collapsed or partially collapsed. Have been going to a Poll unary specialist but he is out of town...HE WENT TO INDIA FOR GODS SAKE. Good, I'll see him in a month if I am seeing anything by then. I hope not. I know three different women at the ashram who were found the next morning, it was that quick. Not me, Man, those ladies had lived lives of sacrifice and beauty as Indian wives. They deserved to leave that way. I don't think this will be painful for me and besides Swami will be there.

Of course I wanted to go to the Chittravathi but frankly I didn't have the courage to even think about going in an Indian Nursing Home.

This is better. Who cares what happens to the Susan Caffery's body garbage. I DON'T, SO DON'T YOU WORRY NONE, CALIFORNIA AND NOVA SCOTIA I'M GLAD